Recap Part 5: Old Friends and New Acquaintances

Calen, Kim, and little Keadan - born on
Valentine's Day

My fifth phase preparing for Geneva was a 3-month opportunity to work in the VIDES Office with Sister Gloria in the Provincial House in San Antonio.  Following the Christmas holidays, I visited my best friend Calen and his fiancée, Kim, on New Year’s Eve with a planned flight from Lexington the next morning.  For me, it was a great send off to my next mission as I was both nervous and excited to work in San Antonio.  I knew that I’d get to meet a whole new group of volunteers as they prepared for their missions but I was worried about making comparisons with my orientation group.  

Nevertheless I was picked up from the airport by Sister Teresa Jones and two other volunteers: Chelsea and Rachel.  We got to know each other on the way back and I had a good feeling that the group would be unique in its own way.  The following day, two more volunteers joined us (Christy and Laura) as well as Carmen – who I had the pleasure to work with in Austin.  Together we began our formation / service camp, led by Sister Gloria.

Working with the kids of Pan-Americana Apartments

It was refreshing to be reoriented in Salesian values – especially when led by Sister Gloria, who brings an aura and charismatic presence to the room when she speaks.  Learning about the other volunteers and their faith journey was a beautiful thing as well – I find that faith sharing is integral as a Christian, knowing that we are a human family with an interlocked future makes solidarity a foundation for which to build relationships and grow as one human body.  Though the group was much different from my previous orientation group, it is nearly impossible to compare as each group is unique.  

VIDES 2011 Group

When the two week orientation ended, all the volunteers left to prepare for their missions except for Chelsea, who was to serve at St. John Bosco School across the street.  Rachel was assigned to South Africa, Laura was to go to Geneva followed by South Sudan, and Christy accepted a place in the Canary Islands.  I was fortunate to have another volunteer to serve with; though we did not work together, we ventured the city and Riverwalk many times together in an attempt to get to know as much of San Antonio as possible in the three months we had.

Sharing a good meal at a Mexican Restaurant before
departing

I came to like San Antonio very much, the city itself could be very touristy on weekends, but offered a lot of culture and a sense of community.  The Provincial House always had visiting Salesian Sisters from the US and other communities around the world, which gave me the opportunity to learn about the Salesian presence in the world.  At one point, an English translation team comprised of Sisters from India, Ireland, England, the Philippines, and Australia convened to convert text for several weeks and they became part of our community during that time.  It was enjoyable to share our culture and also hear their stories of home.  Being in a large community of teachers, spiritual leaders, and missionaries allowed me to expand my horizons more than I expected in San Antonio.

 As a previous volunteer, it has been very interesting to see an organization from the inside out, especially one as unique as VIDES USA.  Every year, many volunteers apply, are trained, and sent to a variety of different countries to serve and accompany youth. Such an undertaking must require the work of a team of people to run everything smoothly, right? The reality is that much of the weight of the program is carried on by one humble and dedicated sister: S. Gloria with S Theresa as part-time assistant (who also has a wide range of other tasks in the community). It is amazing for me that she manages all the recruiting, applications, orientation (including formation and service), finances, donations, mission placements, insurance, volunteer support, website, blog, mission projects, promotion, etc.  Life is different here, there is no doubt, but I know I'm exactly where I'm supposed to be - living simply and witnessing so many influential figures devote their life to service and God.

Recap part 4: Family

After leaving Rome, there was only one more stop before returning home for an extended stay.  As VIDES USA (Sister Gloria in particular) was so generous and helped with my expenses for the VIDES Conference, it was only fitting to give a little of my time to help the Sisters in San Antonio.  However, my intentions were stronger than my will.  While I was there amongst the Sisters physically, I found my mind wandering constantly from all I had experienced this past year as well as combating jet lag from the return trip to the United States.  I accomplished as much as I could, but both Sister Gloria and I realized that I needed some time to analyze my thoughts and reflect on my mission.  I was grateful to Sister Gloria for the opportunity still and knew that when I returned to San Antonio in January that I’d be in a different mindset.

Ahhh...zzzz

The return home brought a feeling of relief and joy to me, especially knowing that I’d be home until the New Year.  Not only that, but I knew that I’d be able to see my extended family in Naperville during Thanksgiving and during Christmas-time.  My family welcomed me home again and it felt nice to finally lay my head down on my old pillow in my bed.

When I first arrived home, I found myself a bit restless – which now I believe is a result of being a volunteer.  I spent my time during the day unpacking, cooking, and cleaning around the house.  However, it wasn’t stressful at all.  By unpacking, it helped give me a feeling of finalization of my mission as well as reflect on all the lessons I learned and gifts I received.  As I mentioned in a previous post, many times during mission, so much is happening simultaneously that it is nearly impossible to digest it all at once.  Going through my belongings slowly gave me the opportunity to understand the importance of such events and experiences. 

I filled my free time with cooking and exercise, which are stress-relievers for me.  As I ended up cooking most dinners in the Dominican Republic, I came to find out that I rather enjoyed cooking.  Though it does not compare to my mother’s cooking, it gave me a chance to experiment a bit and learn what works and what does not…at my family’s expense.  For the most part, the dishes turned out fine, but I also learned a few important lessons by means of my taste buds. 

This will be discussed for many Thanksgivings to come.

Our yearly visit to Naperville to celebrate Thanksgiving has always been one of my favorite holidays.  It’s a time for family, stories, laughter, good food, and relaxation.  We usually cram 40 or so people in one house to catch up with each other and share time together.  Every year, we recount many of the same stories, but they never seem to get old.  We laugh until we cry thinking about our trips to Lake Cumberland, naivety of our childhood, fun times at sports events (UofL sports usually enters into any and every conversation in one way or another as Thanksgiving falls right before bowl season and the start of basketball season), and then there’s the fabricated stories about our yearly tradition of laser tag and battle tech.  A few years back, my dad took it upon himself to brag how he dominated us last year – which no one seemed to remember except for him.  However, we responded by making sure that he would have nothing to brag about this year except for the constant barrage and tunnel of blue he would see. 

It took me many years to realize how blessed I am to have such a close and loving family, one that I look forward to each encounter with.  As I’ve grown older and heard many people complain about going to relatives’ houses – I feel a deep sorrow for them that they are not able to have the same experience.  I wish that they could be able to experience the full gift of family, which is a unique form of love that grows with time, which is why I was so insistent upon being with my family this time of year.

...ya filthy animal.

Merry Christmas!

 The rest of December was spent with family and friends as much as possible.  Rebecca and I even drove to Norfolk before Christmas to accompany Laura and Paul back to Kentucky.  Though it was a 10 hour drive, it did not feel so.  Just being with my siblings again brought me joy and peace – a Christmas blessing in itself.  

Oh yes, the blessing of family and everything that goes along with it.

Recap Part 3: All Roads Lead to Rome...and Hopefully Pass through Trevi

My time at home came and went very quickly after San Francisco – as expected.  However, I had a few more days, for better or worse.  Hurricane Sandy rolled in on the East Coast and delayed our flight for 2 days.  Though it was two more days spent at home, I was eager to go to Trevi, Italy for the VIDES International Conference.

Not that kind of CIA guy, but still.

When the time came, I boarded the plane and went from Louisville to DC then to Italy.  I sat next to a man who worked with the CIA and I spent much of the flight listening to the stories he’d experienced in his 25 years of service.  He was very level-headed, and for lack of a better word, normal in the sense that he was eager to get to Italy for a vacation of his own and not have to worry about work.

Upon my arrival in Rome, I made my way to the train station, with all my bags and began the 3 hour journey to Trevi.  I had very little sleep the night before and it was catching up with me.  My eyelids felt heavy and I soon drifted off to sleep only to be woken by the ringing bell with a voice announcing the next stop: Trevi.  I hurried to gather my bags, but one must be ready to enter and exit a train.  The train took off for its next destination with me still on it and I began to panic a little.  Luckily, there was a stop 4 minutes further and I decided I’d take my chances and get off at that place.   After exiting the train, I decided that my options were to get a taxi, call Sr. Gloria, or to catch a ride back to the station.  My first plan failed when I tried calling Sr. Gloria and found that her number was not activated in Italy, so I decided to hop back on the train and hope that I don’t get checked.  Without incident, I got on the train and exited at the correct station this time…only to be confronted by a new problem.

There's Trevi.  Now how to get there.

Imagine getting off a train at a deserted platform in a rural town with only a few houses around.  On a Sunday (which means that if there should be any services offered in that town, they will not be open on Sunday).  So, I stood at a fork in the road wondering where exactly I was supposed to go.  I tried calling Sr. Gloria and the hotel, but could not reach both.  It was the late afternoon and I began to wonder what my next move was.  A car drove by and I decided to try to ask for directions.  I tried speaking both English and Spanish, but could not communicate, so instead I pulled out the directions to the hotel I had written down and pointed to denote that I did not know how to get there.  The woman pointed up the road and said, “20 minuti”.  So, without further ado, I began walking down the road with no sidewalk with my baggage and the sun setting.  As I walked, I would stop and ask people for directions to make sure I was on the right path, and each time was the same answer: “20 minuti” in the direction I was heading – down a country road with no sidewalk dragging along my baggage.

It was a beautiful area, especially after putting my luggage in my room.

Finally, after an hour or so of walking, I arrived at the hotel.  Besides being a sight for sore eyes, it was a beautiful hotel in the scenic Italian countryside.  Like a refugee, Sister Gloria took me in, gave me a warm meal, and let me catch up on some much needed rest.

The VIDES Conference and experience in Trevi itself were entertaining in a variety of ways, especially since this was my first time in Europe.  Not only that, but there were volunteers from over 40 different countries at the Conference, so even though I was in Italy, it may well have been the United Nations. 

To start, I must share a couple embarrassing stories about meals with Italians, the kings and queens of cuisine.  Besides the fact that our unlimited table wine was comparable to $20 or $30 wine in the United States, we also had 5 course meals for lunch and dinner, which I was unaware of.  So, during my first lunch we started with a salad and proceeded to the pasta course (the primo), which consisted of a simple pasta with bits of ham.  I noticed that many people at our table served themselves relatively small portions.  I followed suit at first, but finished the first plate and went for a second, assuming this was the main course.  After I finished my second plate of pasta, then came the main dishes with sides (the secondo and the contorno) chicken masala with sautéed vegetables and roasted potatoes.  I realized I had made a fatal mistake with the second plate of pasta, but knew the food was too good to pass up.  Then, of course, following the main course they served a fantastic tiramisu that I could not pass up.  Again, I must mention that this was our lunch meal (though, in many places in Europe, it is the biggest meal of the day) and I felt as though I had eaten enough for the rest of the day.  Later on in the week, after I learned about the meal structure, I made a second mistake.  I had noticed that they always served fresh parmesan cheese with the pasta, but promptly removed it from the table after the primo course.  I boldly took it upon myself to save one of the small bowls of cheese to sprinkle on my main dish because I saw we were having a dish with chicken breast and tomatoes.  After I was served and started to sprinkle the savory cheese on my plate only to be interrupted by an Italian girl gasping and asking if I knew what I was doing, from across the table.  Confused, I replied with a simple, “Yes”.  She then smiled, following up her question saying that she just wanted to make sure as she had not seen that before.  I tried to explain that it was similar to having chicken parmesan and she kept giving a rebuttal that the dish was not chicken parmesan, but it was ok if I wanted to have it on my dish.  Realizing the difference in cultures, we called it what it was and laughed it off. 

The conference itself consisted of inspiring speeches from previous volunteers, Salesian Sisters, the founders and coordinators of VIDES, and even the Mother General Yvonne Reugnot and the Rector Major Don Pascual Chávez (who are current heads of the Salesian Order).  The theme of the conference was Recall, Rejoice, Renew and it was created to remind us not only of our roots, but of our chartered direction for the future of the organization.  As Mother Yvonne put it, we are “dwarves standing on the shoulders of giants”; which is to say that we are fortunate to have such a solid foundation laid before us by Don Bosco and Mary Mazzarello and with it we are able to continue to grow, love, and share our gifts.

Time went by too quickly in Trevi and we ended the Conference with in the Cathedral of St. Francis of Assisi, where he was buried.  I felt a special bond to all the other volunteers during that mass; coming from all over the world, speaking a variety of languages, representing our unique cultures but all sharing in the same Catholic tradition and faith.  It was a beautiful realization and it brought me great joy that we didn’t need to know the Italian language to understand the Mass, we each partook in it with our spirit as a united family.

From Assisi, I proceeded to be a good tourist and visit Rome for a week.  I had a quaint little room very close to the Vatican (in fact, I could see the top of St. Peter’s Basilica from the hallway window) and the train station.  At first I thought I would be able to travel to many cities in Italy, but once I started out in Rome, I realized that one could spend years in Rome and still leave many stones unturned and stories untold.  The history, the art, the cathedrals, the food, it was all so much to take in – but I managed. 

I was able to see many of the incredible places that one must experience in Rome: St. Peter’s Square and Basilica, Trevi Fountain, the Coliseum, the Pantheon, the Forum, etc.  Above all though, I was able to see Pope Benedict XVI during his address on a Wednesday – a deeply spiritual experience that I can hardly begin to describe, but also very empowering.  I could write for hours about my time in Rome, but I feel it could just as easily be told through my pictures, though many do not do justice to the subject material.  Nevertheless, enjoy!

Pictures of Rome and Trevi

Recap Part 2: Into the West

I should have expected it, I should have known it was going to happen.  I spent much of the night after the wedding packing and getting ready for my trip out west: first to Phoenix, then Prescott, AZ, then to San Francisco.  My flight left at 6:40 in the morning and I only ended up with about 2 hours of sleep.  As I boarded the plane, I pulled out my notes to practice my speech, but began to nod off.  I woke about an hour later with a sore neck and dry eyes and opted to get some coffee instead of trying to sleep more.  Unfortunately, the airplane-grade coffee wasn’t cutting it for me and I was drifting in and out of sleep.  A bit later on, I arrived in Phoenix and had still not reviewed my notes, but I had all morning to do so.  I just needed to get to the conference first.

With ease (thank God in hindsight…) I made it to the conference center by public transportation, carrying my entire luggage, in time to pick up my packet.  Free coffee and snacks were given out, so I decided to have some breakfast and look at the program schedule to find out where my presentation room was.  As I was finishing up breakfast, I ran into some former classmates from the University of Louisville.  Again, it was refreshing to see familiar faces after being away for some time, so I caught up with them and passed the time.  Looking at my watch, I realized I only had an hour until my session began – and I had still not reviewed my notes.  I hurried to find the room so I could practice and run through my presentation, but was disappointed to find it filled with an ongoing session.  It would end in 30 minutes, so I decided to grab a cup of coffee for the presentation and then come back to review in the presentation room.

Again, my foresight (or maybe just common sense) failed me.  I should have known that a conference with over 10,000 participants trying to get coffee from one Starbucks would be a nightmare.  I stood in line for 20 minutes, then realized that I hadn’t even gone halfway through the line and I was still dragging my bags around.  Frustrated, tired, and hungry – I decided to step outside and walk down to the street to the Einstein Bagel Bros. shop for a cup of coffee instead.  I walked up and down the street to no avail – I know from the map that it should have been right there, but could not find it.  Looking at the time, I gave up and headed back to the meeting room.  Only 10 minutes remained until our session began and my notes remained in the same spot that I had packed them the night before.  I had very successfully wasted many hours without practicing my presentation and I began to realize that it was too late.  

I look so smug, but trust me, I'm just falling asleep.

When the time came to present, I went to the front of the room, loaded my presentation, and opened up with a couple witty jokes.  The crowd laughed light-heartedly which helped ease my tension.  Once the slides came on the full screen, I saw Dr. Evans (my thesis advisor) enter the room and I began to talk.  By the grace of God, the words and information that had been sealed away in my head re-opened and poured out like valuables neatly preserved in a lockbox.  I tried to keep the audience engaged full-time, but some of them were as tired as I was.  By the end of the talk, I noticed I had ended at the time limit and now awaited the QA session – sometimes the easiest part and sometimes the hardest.  Despite my initial concern that I appeared unorganized and scatterbrained, I received very positive feedback and met with some important figures after the talk.  They were impressed and curious as to the future of my work – but those were answers even I did not know.  I was even presented with an opportunity to pursue a PhD at UMass in Boston in Public Policy – though it would have been a 7 year program.  In the end, I earned 2^nd place in the competition, which came with a small monetary prize!  I had a resurgence of thanks in my heart for all the opportunities I’ve been given these recent years, for the people who have helped enable them, and to God for his guidance and answering my prayers.

Following the conference, I was picked up by a very close friend, Kane, who is following his dreams to become a pilot and studying at Embry-Riddle University.  We traveled to Prescott where I was able to witness the tranquility and vastness of the southwest.  From the starry nights to the cloudless days, I felt at peace with the world and the direction of my life.  Though I always wonder where I will end up in the subsequent phases in life, I still strive to feel that comfort and joy in the present moment.  Sometimes, on the road you forget to take time and see what’s around you – but being in Prescott allowed me to do just that.  It feels comforting to know that you have friends who keep that open door policy, no matter the circumstance.

From Prescott, I made one final stop before returning home from out west: San Francisco.  Two other good friends of mine, Michael and Paul, live in the bay area and I had been longing to see them.  It’s interesting how one can visit a friend who they have not seen in quite a while and pick up conversation as if no time had passed.  In the grand scheme of life, not much time had passed, but being away from family and friends can make it feel so.  However, being away from those comforts and loved ones makes the heart grow fonder and stronger.  We had a memorable night at Paul’s house with a home-cooked meal from Golbi, Paul’s girlfriend, and drank home-made wine that Michael made.  We stoked the fire and enjoyed each other’s company until late into the night – and I realized it’s those nights I’ll remember forever, the ones where we are truly alive in the moment.

Recap and Prologue to my New Mission: Part 1

I’ll try to use this post to give a brief update of the past four months: life after service, seeing family and friends, re-entry into America, and my future volunteer plans.  In that time, so many things happened and I have so much to be thankful for – I’ll do my best to share them in an abridged way, but I will apologize ahead of time if I leave out someone or something that should be mentioned.

Leaving the Dominican Republic…

Going from this to 40 degree weather in a matter of days.

With the conclusion of my service in the Dominican Republic, I’ve had a brief hiatus and have used it to rest, relax and see some loved ones.  My last week in the Dominican Republic was spent with a good friend in Caberate, a beautiful coastal town on the north side of the island famous for kite surfing and its beautiful beaches.  It was interesting to see the north side of the island and a great time to relax, but my heart was still in the south – in Barahona. 

After a week of sun, coffee, fresh fruit, kayaking, and relaxation, I was ready to go home and see my family.  Though, a weird feeling was present in me – that longing to see people that you have not seen in a while, but also that feeling that you know things are about to change.  It was a combination of excitement and nervousness – to take my present self with new experiences back to my old life.  What would this combination yield? 

Tranquility

I spent my last nights in Santo Domingo with Anna, who accompanied me in Cuba.  She was such a blessing to me and so very hospitable.  Sleep evaded me during my last night in the Dominican Republic, my thoughts were like a crowded intersection.  Thoughts of the past nine months zoomed by: the people I had met, the experiences I’d had, the sights I’d seen and they were colliding with thoughts about the future: my family, my friends, and what the future may have in store for me.

…and arriving in Louisville, KY...

British Virgin Isles

My flight from Santo Domingo to Puerto Rico to the US went very smoothly, thank God.  However, I immediately realized that it would take some time to readjust to living in a first world country. 

Quick story:  

My second connection was in Charlotte, NC and I had some time to spare.  For some time, I had craved sushi, since it practically does not exist in the Dominican Republic.  Giving into my cravings, I thought that I’d treat myself to a bit at a sushi bar in the airport.  My mouth watered as I walked up and scanned the menu.  The woman next to me had just gotten her Salmon Roll, but was busy on her cell phone.  My stomach gave a small growl and I wondered what I should get.  Not two minutes later, the woman next to me took one bite of her roll, laid cash on the table and walked away.  An idea popped into my head, but I hesitated to take action: Should I take the rest of her food?  She didn’t touch it except for one piece and it was just made.  Plus, it would be a free meal for me…

When I finally made up my mind to scavenge her meal, the waiter took action first, taking the plate and promptly throwing the freshly-made sushi in the trash.  She set a new napkin in place, greeted me with a smile, and asked what I would like to eat.  I smiled back at her, but replied, “Nothing, thanks.  I’m not really that hungry.” 

When I got back to Louisville, I was greeted at the airport with smiles from my family and a happy heart.  Not even the sushi incident could bring my spirits down in this moment.  There was so much to say and so very much to get caught up on.  We spent the rest of the night sharing time, a little wine, and a "puro Cubano".

The guys sharing a "Puro"

My arrival back home did not leave me with too much time to rest – something I didn’t think about ahead of time.  I arrived back the night of October 6^th and had plans to fly to Phoenix on the morning of October 14^th for a presentation – one that I had not yet made.  But all that could wait.  For the time being, I was happy to be home.

Emma and James 

The last couple days leading up to my flight were more hectic than I would have liked them to be.  I rushed to finish my presentation at the last minute for the INFORMS conference in Phoenix, leaving me with a feeling that I was not fully prepared to deliver it.  The day before heading off to Phoenix, I was able to relax and celebrate, as it was the day for two of my good friends, Emma and James, to be married.  The ceremony was beautiful and the reception was festive – a wonderful time was had by all.  The reception gave me a chance to talk with many friends who I had not seen since last January, it was a very refreshing to know that even if I had changed, some things like friendship would always remain the same.